Thank You, Ocean

What would I choose

If I could choose my name?

And can’t I choose it?

What holds me back?

Societal norms,

Rules,

Expectations,

Heritage,

Efficiency.

All spells of the mind.

All colonized.

I look to people who choose their own names

The Oceans

The Brights

Of the world

With a bit of contempt

Which

After sitting with it

I recognize as just jealousy.

They’re brave

Fierce

Willing to forge their own path.

I am, too.

Just not with my name

Apparently.

But what would I choose?

What represents me?

Something of the Earth feels resonant.

Forest is too ordinary.

Tiger too predictable.

Would I be worthy of either anyway?

A majestic collection of trees and persons and organisms

And a beautiful predator.

Fern,

Definitely not for me.

Ginger,

No.

Sugar, snake, orchid.

Orchid would be interesting.

Sphinx?

None ring true.

Who am I if not Ed?

What is Edward?

A rich guard.

Do I guard the rich or am I rich because I guard?

Either way,

Colonization is branded into my very name,

In many ways I am its essence:

Wealth and defense.

The most basic representation of me in

L a n g u a g e

Is colonized.

No wonder this is such a challenge.

Colonization is there even at the root of me.

Root then?

Am I root?

No,

But maybe just.